Women are like apples...
Now I'm sure that you have received the e-mail that praises women, saying that they are apples and the good ones are on the top of the tree, and men are too lazy to reach to the top, but instead pick from the bottom. On occasion, a good man comes along who is willing to pick from the top of the tree, getting a really good woman. A year or two back, I got a variation of this e-mail. At the bottom of the paragraph description of good women, there was a few sentences that will always stick in my brain..."Now men. Men are like a fine wine. They start out as grapes and as women, we have to pound the sh*t out of them so they are something decent to have dinner with." I try to be an optimistic person, but I often fail at it. I have been optimistic, hoping that there are in fact, good guys out there. Being at university, several people have asked me where the good guys are...I tend to respond with, "They are already taken." But I have discovered something tonight. There are very few good guys. Now, you don't have to share my view, and I'm sure, if you have a wonderful man, you won't. I was talking to a guy tonight, thinking he was a nice guy. He's always treated me with respect, he's been very quick to ask forgiveness if he's offended me or upset me. But tonight, I saw a side that wasn't very pleasant. Going back to the e-mail, how many guys are willing to reach up to the top of the tree and pick us wonderful women? Also, my promise to wait for a gooder. Is there even enough gooders for us all? It has been my experience that there are very few good guys out there. They may appear all warm and fuzzy on the outside, but we all have our quirks do we not? I have been played more in these last couple months, than in my entire life. Why is that?! Even by people that I expected more from. That brings me to think that possibly we areexpecting too much? I mean, as women, we are by no means perfect, or close to it. Have we just been taught to only be treated like princesses, and refuse to accept anything less? I mean, yes, we accept less, but all along, wanting more. Are we being entirely too ambitious in our quest for our perfect man? I also can't help but blame myself for being played. Do I just expect better and continually get disappointed? Am I setting myself up for failure? Is Jamie, the pessimist, actually being too optimistic? I realize that I am still young, and have plenty of time to find myself a wonderful man, but I can't help but question whether he is in fact out there. My question is this..are there really guys out there willing to pick from the top of the tree, treat us women like princess, and willing to go through hell and back to be with us?
Song of the Week: 9 crimes - Damien Rice
Song of the Week: 9 crimes - Damien Rice
posted by Jamie at 1:37 AM
5 Comments:
are you done yet?
The men that pick up the easily reached rotten apples will pick up many apples, and may even taste some, but he'll throw them all away. Some of the amazing apples will choose to fall from the tree for the attention but will soon rot and be treated just like the rest. Truly good men will ignore the rotten apples and climb for the good ones. Some of the men will eventually tire of rotten apples and they too will climb for the good ones. The rest will continue to pick through the easy to reach rotten apples but will always long for those amazing apples at the top of the tree.
Someone will wonder, what if a good apple chooses to fall to the ground with the rotten apples to be noticed and is picked up before it begins to rot? Even if it has not yet begun to rot it will already be damaged and bruised by the fall and will likely be mistaken for just another rotten apple, to be treated like the rest of the rotten apples and then discarded. Eventually, it will rot.
First off, being a "nice guy" myself, I can tell you that we are not all taken. We are all single. All of the rotten apples are taken by all of the most amazing girls. We're just the shoulder they cry on. We are always there for them when they need us, and that's why we'll never be anything more than "good friends". I have come to this conclusion from personal experiences. I'm always told by my girl friends(not girlfriends) that they would kill to find a guy like me. Somebody who care no matter what. Somebody who will be her best friend. Somebody who really loves her...
It's funny how they can say that, but be so blind to overlook the one guy who's been right in front of her all along.
I've kind of accepted the notion that I am destined to always be the best friend, and never the boyfriend. Sometimes I hate myself for being the crying shoulder. But I don't know how to be anything else, so I guess I'll just have to deal with it.
If you talk to a couple good guys, I think you'll find that the nicest guys are also the loneliest.
If your dealing with guys that pick up fallen fruit haven't you fallen as well then? I say this not to be mean but to change your mode. The good guys want a strong independent woman. A woman that is strong to her convictions and doesn't compromise her integrity. I would suggest that if you truly want a good guy that you start working on loving yourself more. Find the best place to sit in the tree to nurture your fruit, in the sun high above the places where you cannot be knocked down before your ripe. Your young learn to love yourself and as you do you will shine grabbing the attention of the perfect man.
@randy:
You maybe a nice guy but you sound like a push over. Its one thing to be nice but you still need to be male. Speak up, share your desires. Grow a spine. The same holds true for you. Love yourself respect yourself. As you do you will gain the confidence to climb that tree. When you get up there you'll realize that the woman you refer to now as good apple are really just rotten fruit.
Having some experience climbing trees its a lot easier said then done. As you get higher into the tree everything becomes much more fragile. Mistakes made at this level have much more devastating effects then at the lower levels. It has a hyperbolic effect on everything. The highs are heavenly and the lows are hell.
I have found my apple. I climbed to her and experienced bliss. I lost track of my footing and slipped. Crashing all the way down to the bottom. I spent sometime healing myself before making another attempt. I started climbing again as I got to the very top, my insecurities faced me like a freight train. I lost track of my footing. As I slipped for the second time I tried to grab on to stop my fall only to crack the branch my apple is attach to. Now laying under the tree bruised and scarred. I hope that branch can mend itself and grow stronger then before. I hope this happens before the winter sets in and turns my apple into ice.
The journey at the top is not for the weak of heart. Its not easy it will never be, much more to lose. I feel blessed and cursed at the same time. All the apples that lay beside me pale in comparison to the one on top. I can't do anything but wait and see if it heals.
To love truly is to experience feelings in all their intensity. Not just happiness but sadness as well.
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